After a town gets sold on Ebay, this guy tries to sell his family. It's bad, but not as bad it first sounds.

Young said the auction winner would receive a lifetime of platonic companionship, including invitations to family outings and holiday gatherings as well as tips on writing, gardening and cooking. The minimum bid was $5 million.

The family was willing to relocate anywhere, and the elder Youngs would change their surname.

"You have patrons of the arts, museums and charities. I wanted a patron for my family," he said.

More holiday gatherings with family? As if people don't already have enough of those without buying themselves more.